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An open letter to an old friend

To my old friend,

How I yearn for your sweet embrace that calms my nerves whenever I am tormented with the demands of life. It’s been years since the last time I saw you. How long was it? I am sorry; I really am because I can’t remember anymore. I was so busy growing up that I lost track of counting the years that quickly passed without you.

Have I told you before the story of how I met you? If my memory serves me right, I think I haven’t had the chance to sit with you and talk about how everything started. So here it goes, our love story.

I was in high school, when I started feeling something in my head. At first, I cannot explain how it was because it’s too painful that I can’t even think straight. You know the feeling of being hammered ten times in your head? Yeah, I might be exaggerating, but that’s how excruciating the pain was. Whenever I open my eyes, it seems though that I am in a different dimension of the universe because everything is spinning around. What I hate the most is when I feel like throwing up. It irritates me that I just opt to lay on my bed and sleep.

 When my mother observed my sluggishness; she kept on nagging me that made me furious. It’s too bad of me to act that way towards my mother, yeah, I know, it’s my fault anyway please don’t be mad. When she learned that I suffered silently because of my headache, we went straight to your place. I admit I wasn’t excited. I didn’t like the idea of having you in my life because I know how my life would change if I will welcome you. Anyway, I was left with no options since I really needed your company and comfort.

The first time I held you in my sweaty palm, I hated you. Yes, my apologies, for I felt that towards you. I bet you know the reason because you were with me all the time. I will never forget how I looked the first time I put you on my face. It was terrible. I looked like a lost kid without any friends in the school. But you know what; others told me that I looked great in your company.

It was awkward at first walking with you because my classmates were glaring at me like I have something unusual on my face. I was a subject of attention for weeks and I hated it. In all honesty, I loathed you for ruining my peaceful life. I just wanted to feel good, but you made everything worse, which made me decide to scratch you from my life once and for all.

I dumped you somewhere that I can no longer remember where since I really don’t like to see you anymore, ever. Days without you seemed like a strange feeling for me. I felt incomplete. Little did I know that I am already accustomed to your presence that made my weary days lovely and light.  My headache became worse, my eyes felt like burning, and I was nauseous whenever I tried to do something. Then I realized that I needed you more than ever in my life.

I was clouded with my own thoughts that I didn’t see how important your role in my growth and health was. I am really sorry for abandoning you. I realize now that I should have treated you better.

But we certainly accomplished a lot of great work together. In those moments that everything seems so blurry, you were right there, ever ready to assist me in seeing things clearer. You are a big part of me, and I am who I am today because of your endless efforts and sacrifices to be with me even to the lowest points in my life.


Despite losing you countless times, I have found a replacement, and they are essentially the upgraded version of you. Don’t worry, I might find another pair of eyeglasses in the future; you will always be the best for me.


Thank you, my friend, for journeying with me.


Missing you so much.

 

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